There is plenty of speculation as to the causes of gray divorce. But, the reality is that divorce happens for various reasons, regardless of age or how long it has lasted to that point. You will need to find a new place to live and might stress about money, but that is normal. But, having to go through all of this when you are younger means that you have time to bounce back and build everything back up. When you are older, it might still take time, and that could run into your retirement. While they don’t garner as much attention, they aren’t rare. They are just starting to happen a little more, now that divorce isn’t considered such an atrocity.
What is a Gray Divorce?
A gray divorce is one that happens after a marriage that has lasted a long time. These tend to be older couples that have been together for decades. They don’t always marry young, but it does happen. Gray divorces are about one in four divorces and fifteen percent of people over fifty divorce. There are many different reasons for gray divorce. Whether it is because they grew apart or they stayed together for the children, they are a growing trend. A lot of parents think that staying together for the children is best and once they are older, they divorce. However, there are some theories that while divorce affects young children horribly; there is still emotional damage done when gray divorce happens. You can read more about them here.
The Cost of a Gray Divorce
Divorce is never cheap or fast. How long you have been married, or your age doesn’t matter when it comes to the cost of divorce. It will always be a hard process that you can count on for a bumpy ride. But, when you are older, it can cause a few more problems in the rest of your life. Getting yourself back together afterward can be especially hard since you don’t have a lot of years to bounce back before retirement. In some cases, it can even pull from those funds for you. This can all cause stress and end up being a health risk. Everyone has to deal with stress in their lives, but when you are older it takes a heavier toll and can have a bigger effect
Economics of Gray Divorce
In some cases, divorce might be best for everyone involved. But, that doesn’t mean that there won’t be economic struggles with it. When you divorce younger, you have more time to recover economically. Sure, you might dig into your savings for the attorneys and fees. But, you can recover over time. It might take the funds you get for retiring and then some. This will mean that you will still have to work and might even need a couple of jobs just to keep up. On top of that, you might try to put more money into savings for your retirement plans. And this is only if you were able to retain it all during the dissolution of your marriage. If the divorce decree states that your spouse is entitled to part of your 401K or military retirement, you might have to work that much harder.
Who Gets What Gray Divorce
Gray divorce is like every other divorce when it comes to the fact that dividing assets gets complicated. It can be hard to remember or prove who had what coming into the marriage and just as hard to remember what was a gift to a couple or one party in the union. In some cases, these are things that can be worked out during mediation, but when they can’t, they have to go to court. And that tends to be when things get messy. This is where having a skilled and experienced attorney can make all the difference. You need to pick your battles, but you also need someone to fight with you to win those battles. If you know that there are things you want that you just can’t lose, they can fight for those and let go of others.
Gray divorce can feel like the end of the world; it is just so painful. But, you will make it through the process. It’s just another experience, and you have been through worse. You know this will be better for you in the long run. Having an attorney with skills and experience in these cases makes all the difference. They will be able to take a lot of that weight off your shoulders and support you. They can help you find the closure you need and try to speed up the process as much as possible. Your attorney makes all the difference in these situations. You can start your search here.